Allah (SWT) said:” Marry of the women that please you: two, three, or four. But if you feel that you shall not be able to deal justly, then only one or what your right hand possesses. That would be more suitable to prevent you from doing injustice.” (An-Nisa’: 3)
One must note that man is first told to marry two, three, or four women, then he is advised to marry only one if he cannot deal justly with more than one. This does not mean that Islam encourages all men to marry at least two women, but that such an option is undoubtedly permissible for those who can fulfill its conditions. The verse also sets the upper limit of four in a society in which an unlimited number of simultaneous marriages were allowed. Thus, a man must be able and willing to divide his time and wealth equitably before he is allowed to have more than one wife. Conversely, if he is unable to feed, clothe, and house all his wives justly, then, according to this Qur’anic command, he should not marry than one. The point is that the permissibility of polygyny has been exemplified in the Sunnah of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW), who was allowed by Allah (SWT). Many of the marriages were indeed for socio-political purposes, such as encouraging the remarriage of widows, breaking certain taboos, and uniting clans; however, the Prophet (SAW) still married those who pleased him and turned down those who did not.
Nevertheless, many Muslims today find the subject of polygyny distasteful and insist on considering plural marriage demeaning to women. This is primarily because the roles of men and women in Western society, at least, have become severely distorted. Women openly compete with men for the same jobs; men sue their wives for support payments; women’s clothing styles include suits and ties; men’s clothing styles include bracelets, necklaces, earrings, and long hair; and both sexes wear interchangeable clothing under the title of ‘unisex’. The female has lost her natural position of protection in Western society and is thus obliged to fight for equality with the male. Under such circumstances, it is not surprising to find Western women and their Eastern counterparts vehemently opposed to polygyny.
Very few women in liberated Western society consider obedience to their men a necessity for a smooth married life. In fact, obedience to one’s husband is not even considered a positive characteristic worthy of development in a woman. Even fewer modern women are willing to admit that differences exist between men and women; that God made allowances for men’s roles as leaders, providers, and protectors. Western women deny these things even though the same differences are communicated in insidious ways in Western society itself. Women who are sexually harassed when at work are often forced to prostitute themselves to keep their positions or to get an advance; men outnumber women in positions of power (there has yet to be a female president of the United State) and most of the lower paid menial occupations which involve service (waitress, cahiers, etc.) continue to be filled by women despite new roles which women are said to be assuming in the West. However, Islam teaches us that Allah created everything in pairs, the male and the female, and assigned them roles accordingly.
Allah (SWT) said:” Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given one more than the other and because they support them from their means. Therefore, the righteous women are devoutly obedient and guard in the absence (of their men) what Allah would have them guard (of their chastity and honor.” (An-Nisa’: 34). Allah (SWT) said further:” And among His signs is that He created for you mates from among yourselves. And He has put love and mercy between you that you may live in tranquility with them. Verily, in that are signs for those who reflect.” (Ar-Rum: 21)
Islam has defined the male role as that of provider and protector; whereas, the female has been given a supportive and dependent role, which naturally involves a certain amount of submission and obedience to the male. The outlook of Islam towards the roles of males and females is thus in complete contrast to that of twentieth-century Western society. The position of women in the West today may appear progressive from the standpoint of voting rights, property rights, and educational opportunities, but from the standpoint of the family, their position has degenerated alarmingly. The expulsion of women from their natural roles within the family is part of the symptoms of a declining culture. The fact that Western culture and society are dying has been proclaimed on the covers of Newsweek and Time magazines. The incidence of illegitimate birth has risen rapidly in the West during the last few years, and teenage pregnancies have become the norm. Stories of wife swapping, child abuse, and various sexually transmitted diseases like herpes and AIDS linked to sexual promiscuity should lead any sane person to question the sexual mores of Western society and the problems of enforced monogamy. (To be continued)
Abu Ameenah Bilal Philips
